#friend this is literally so late so there's no pressure if you'd rather drop it BUT

[sofreddie]

Nanny No More

Summary: Reader is The Ackles' nanny. She comes home to quite the surprise. It changes everything.

Characters: Jensen x Nanny!Reader

Warnings: Fluff, Smut

Word Count: 1,816

A/N: Written for @jerkbitchidjitassbutt. Thanks for the inspiration! GIF above is closest I could find to match the story, though it's not a shower really. 😉 And just in case - this is a work of fiction. No harm or hate intended towards any persons.

Y/N had just returned from dropping the kids off at a sleepover. She was their live-in nanny and had been for years since Jensen's wife had passed giving birth. Jensen was home on hiatus and his restlessness was driving everyone up the walls.

Her attention was drawn to the other room as she heard Jensen muttering and grunting. She curiously moved forward, worried for what she might find, only to be stopped dead in her tracks.

For one thing, there was a terrible leak in the ceiling. A pipe must have burst. But that wasn't what caught and held her attention.

Jensen was stood on a footstool, arms stretched above him as he was attempting to repair the leak. His t-shirt rode up, exposing a bit of his stomach and buckled jeans. His t-shirt clung to him like a second skin, the water leaking from the pipe having gradually soaked through his clothing.

He lowered his arms, grunting in frustration. He quickly removed the soaked t-shirt, using it to wipe off his face, before tossing it aside and getting back to work.

Y/N's jaw dropped open as she watched the muscles in his arms and back flexing and glistening. She reflexively squeezed her thighs together, feeling a sudden, overwhelming swell of desire.

She'd always found him attractive. She'd be blind not to. But even though she had lived with him for so long, it was like a respectful roommate sort of situation. She was the nanny after all.

Seeing him like this…well, this was new.

Suddenly, bits of the ceiling fell down upon Jensen as the hole opened wider, more water spilling forth in a gush. Jensen was drenched head-to-toe. He managed to reach up and find the shut off, stopping the flood of water, albeit a bit late.

He looked like he just got out of the shower, jeans and all. He was literally dripping with water, strands of his hair hanging down into his face. He huffed before finally noticing Y/N standing there.

"Oh, hey," he smiled, that charming and bright smile that was now making her flutter, "Sorry about the mess," he laughed, gesturing around himself.

She still couldn't move, couldn't speak. Her eyes were trailing over every inch of him as she bit her lip, squeezing her thighs once more, tighter than before.

Jensen's eyes shot over her movements, catching her wandering gaze, her bitten lips, and the not-so-subtle neediness she was emanating. He wasn't a fool. He knew exactly what she was thinking.

He'd been thinking about this very thing for a while now. Jared had encouraged him. But Y/N was a good friend and the nanny and she never showed an interest in all the time she had been with them.

He wasn't about to let this opportunity slip.

He took several slow steps towards her, his eyes trained on hers, "See something you like?" he teased. Her breath hitched. The tension between them filled the room. She wanted to jump his bones right then and there. When he licked that plump bottom lip of his into his mouth she just about sprung on him.

Then she remembered why she hadn't let herself do anything before. She was the nanny. If things went wrong...she loved the kids and didn't want to see them hurt or confused. In the end, she chickened out.

"Y-you should probably go shower," she cleared her throat, breaking the gaze between them and gesturing with her thumb over her shoulder as she took slow retreating steps, "I'll go call a plumber."

She turned and dashed so quick. Jensen was cursing himself under his breath. He knew she wanted him. There was no question about that now. But something was holding her back.

He took himself upstairs to shower. He stripped out of the remaining wet clothes and dropped them in a heap to the floor with a squelch. The hot water soothed his aching muscles and washed away the grime.

It wasn't long before his mind wandered back to Y/N downstairs, staring at him hungrily, clenching her thighs. Gen had told him to ask her out on a date, Jared said just go for it. But her body and reaction was making it hard to think straight.

His hand wandered down his body, wrapping around his fully erect cock. He sighed a little in relief at the pressure, before he began stroking himself. This had become routine at this point, jerking off in the shower with Y/N's image in his mind and her name on his lips.

After he came, he quickly finished his shower, feeling less tense than before. He was formulating a way to ask her out and gauge her interest as he made his way back downstairs.

Much like Y/N earlier, he was stopped in his tracks. Y/N was bent over on the floor, her ass in the air as she cleaned up the mess on the floor. He was instantly hard again, as if the shower never even happened.

A groan punched past his lips, catching her attention. She looked over her shoulder at him, smiling sweetly, before rising from her spot on the floor, tossing away some of the mess.

She's a little dirty and her clothes are a little damp in spots, but he's wound so tight and he thinks she only looks even better. He'd love to help her out of those filthy clothes. Maybe with his teeth.

"Can I kiss you?" he suddenly blurted out as he took several steps to stand directly in front of her. He hadn't meant to say it, but in that moment it was all he could think or want.

All his plans flew out the window.

His eyes looked her over fondly as he brushed the hair back from her face, "Can I kiss you?" he asked again. She stood in dumbfounded silence, heart racing. She tried to speak but her throat was closed. Instead, she nodded minutely. He smirked slightly before leaning in pressing his lips to hers.

He instantly felt fireworks explode between them, like nothing he had ever felt before. He tugged her closer to him, his hands finding her lower back. She too was feeling the intensity, swooning under his command.

Everything began to work up quickly, their bodies demanding more from each other. Jensen turned and backed her against the closest wall. His knee found its way between her legs, his thigh pressing against her core.

She moaned loudly into the kiss and Jensen eagerly swallowed it down. Their bodies ground together, their kisses and hands growing desperate. It had been ages since either one of them had been with someone.

"I want you," he breathed out against her lips, barely parting from her and hating even the minute distance required to speak, "Want you in my bed. Wanted you there forever," his lips grazed down her jaw and neck as he pressed himself tightly against her.

"Yes," she hissed out in a breath. He moaned loudly, before scooping her up, wrapping her legs around his waist. He dashed up the stairs with her in his arms, surprising her with his strength.

His muscles were more than just show.

He took her directly to his bedroom, closing the door shut behind them. He didn't let her down until they were standing at the foot of his bed.

"You sure this is what you want?" he checked with her again. He had to be sure. If she didn't want this, or might regret it later, then he'd rather not do it.

"Are you?" she blurts out hesitantly.

He grinned broadly, his eyes sparkling, "If I could have it my way, you'd never leave my bed again."

She crashed into him, stealing his breath with her kisses. The urgency picked up once more and they were quickly naked and lying on the bed together.

Then his words truly settled in her mind. Her breath hitched as she met his eyes. Without words he could feel things shift between them. Everything slowed as the mood shifted.

She could feel his passion and want with every kiss laid to her bare skin. She could feel him laying claim with every moan she gave to every mark he left.

When his head sank between her legs, she thought she'd died and gone to Heaven. It took him no time at all to quickly learn her spots and he proceeded to slowly work her into a frenzy.

Just as she was about to reach her peak, he stopped. She groaned and looked down at him. He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. His lips were swollen and wet, his hair a mess from her fingers tugging on it.

"Wanna feel it the first time I make you come," he breathed out, working his way up her body. At some point he had slipped a condom on. She was too out of her mind to have noticed. He ground himself against her wet and twitching folds and she nearly screamed.

"Please, Jen, please," she nearly sobbed, desperate for her release, desperate for him. She had dreamed of this moment for so long. Her want and desire had morphed into utter need.

He locked away the sounds of her sweet pleading for another time. He was ready to give her what she needed. What they both needed.

He kissed her deep, letting her taste herself on his tongue as he slowly entered her. When he finally reached the hilt, pressed as deep as he could go, they both gasped.

Jensen moved slow and languidly, making them both savor every movement, every touch, every thrust like a fine meal. There was nothing but pleasure, but he was skillfully keeping them both back from that edge, drawing out the connection between them.

He paused from his ministrations of marking her neck with his mouth to look her in the eyes. He cupped her face, adjusted his hips, and began to thrust a little faster and harder while holding her gaze.

She could feel herself cresting, the edge just out of reach. Jensen felt amazing inside her, around her. Better than any dream she could have conjured.

She was pretty sure she was in love with him.

At the realization, she climaxed hard. Her eyes clenched shut in sync with her walls clenching around his cock. Jensen cried out her name, following her over the edge.

He continued to pump into her, working them both through their highs. After catching their breath, Jensen slowly pulled out and discarded the condom, before returning to the bed.

He laid on his back and scooped an arm around Y/N's shoulders, bringing her to half lay across him.

Tomorrow they'd deal with the plumber, the mess and the kids returning from their sleepover. They'd figure everything out. But for now, there was this and the start of something amazing.

Forevers:

@sis-tafics

@lyarr24

@calaofnoldor

@hobby27

@spnbaby-67

RPF:

@smoothdogsgirl

JENSEN TAGS:

@akshi8278

@jerkbitchidjitassbutt

[losersclubimagines]

the coroner’s girl

[the losers club x reader]

warnings: swearing, bullying, blood and body parts.

summary: being the coroner’s daughter means dressing practically rather than flatteringly, carrying your father’s blood samples in your schoolbag, and having maybe too much of an avid interest in human anatomy for your classmates’ tates. you’re an outcast - a loser, something you had always been and been pretty okay with, until the last day of school in 1985, when greta bowie gets a little too familiar with the things you carry in your backpack.

request here

Being a coroner's daughter was never going to be easy.

It was like being the daughter of the exterminator that came to rid your school of rats or termites; nothing inherently bad about it - it was an honest profession, all right - but goddamn embarrassing.

But you knew that. You'd known that since second grade when the teacher said your class had to go around the circle and everybody said what their parents did for a living. There were four temps, one dentist, one taxi driver, a receptionist and a cashier before you proudly said, "my dad examines dead people to see how they died!"

Your teacher had thought it was interesting. Your classmates, not so much. They thought you were dirty. Most of them didn't touch you, if they could help it. You had your own special brand of cooties, creatively named 'The Y/n Touch" that the others would pass and tease each other with at recess and lunch in games you couldn't participate in. Well, fine. They'd decided you were to be an outcast, you'd do just that.

You stopped really trying in third grade. Stopped putting your hair in curlers every night and teasing it with hairspray every morning like the others, stopped dressing fashionably and started dressing practically, stopped trying to fit in at all. A lot of girls talked about lipstick or boys or singers, or else music you'd never heard of and movies you'd never watched. The boys talked about girls and soccer and bikes, or else books you'd never read or bands you'd never listened to. You didn't fit in with anyone else's conversation - you knew hearts and brains and lungs, vessels and arteries and veins, homeostasis and rigor mortis and symptoms of asphyxiation. But when you tried to talk about that, all you got was disgusted or scandalised looks, so you stopped. You kept to yourself.

All through third grade to eighth grade, the closest thing you had to a friend were our various biology teachers throughout the years. You were hopeless at the other sciences, barely passing, and mediocre at everything else, but your biology always came back with a fat shiny A on every report card.

It was the last day of school before summer in 1985. Before you'd gone to school, your dad had passed you three plastic sample jars, half-full of blood. At your raised eyebrows, he grew defensive.

"The refrigerator's stocked again!"

"Maybe it wouldn't be if you did your job like every other coroner in America and stopped-"

"Yes, I know, I know," he interrupted, looking badgered. "Can you just ask your friend in the prep room to store them, just for a day? I'll have the refrigerator cleared out by then."

"Fine." You checked the lids were done up tightly then stuffed the jars in your satchel. "Can I go now?"

"Yeah, go, you'll be late. Don't go throwing your bag around now, those jars are done up tight but they'll burst with pressure."

"Got it," you called, moving to the front door.

"In the fridge as soon as you get to school!" he shouted from the cellar. "As soon as!"

You shut the door in reply, disgruntled.

You did as bid, making your way to the science prep room before class and sweet-talking Mr Keary into letting you store the samples in the huge refrigerator. They kept the stuff used for dissecting in there - sheep hearts and frogs and pig brains. Needless to say, you'd aced that particular section of biology. A scalpel was so familiar in your hand by now, it felt like an extension of your fingers.

They stayed there throughout the day. It grew hotter and hotter, but you kept all your layers on - black jeans cuffed to keep them from trailing on your battered sneakers, a charcoal-grey shirt of your father's that hung to your thighs and a soft, woolly, dark green cardigan that swung about your calves. You liked the comfort that layers of clothes gave you - like wearing multiple plates of armour. The day passed as usual - you ad no biology class, so you spoke to barely anyone and barely anyone spoke to you, you kept your head down and ate lunch alone and doodled in every class until the final bell rang. Great. Okay. Finally.

You swung by the prep room and grabbed your father's samples, placing them carefully in your backpack, ensuring they were cushioned by your pencil case and textbooks before hefting the bag onto one shoulder and making the trek to the front exit.

You were literally twenty feet from the door when it happened.

Greta Bowie stormed out of her history class with a dark expression on her face, evidently having to be held back to be lectured by her teacher. Her mean eyes flickered over the corridor for someone to take her anger out on, and, most unfortunately, they landed on you. You didn't even notice her until her shoulder collided hard with yours, and your bag slipped from your shoulder and sailed through the air, hitting the linoleum hard and skidding away. As you stumbled, Greta hooked an ankle around your's and sent you flying backwards.

"Sorry, Y/n!" she called, sweet as sugar. Sweet as fucking diabetes, you thought to yourself furiously as you reached for your bag - only to draw back in surprise and dread. A large, dark, sticky stain was spreading rapidly through the fabric. You tore your bag open, pleading with God that it wasn't so - but of course it was. The samples your dad had entrusted you with, that you'd chilled all day and packed so carefully in your bag - had burst on impact, and now two were all but empty, and the third was drooling blood slowly, it'd lid knocked to the side rather than all the way off.

"Shit!" you shouted, jumping up, your hands flying to your hair to grab it in despair. "Fuck it all, shit on it you bitch!" Before you even realised what you were doing, you'd lunged at the retreating Greta and shoved her in the back. Hard. So hard she flew into the lockers and slammed her head on the metal.

She yelled in pain, spinning round to look at you. The whole corridor was raptly focused on the two of you, Greta furious and red-faced, a bleeding split on her forehead where she'd grazed a padlock, and you, realising what you'd just done with your eyes widening and your feet beginning to retreat.

"You are so fucking dead!"

Greta ran right at you, her arms catching you in the midriff and knocking you back several paces. You gasped as your back slammed into the floor, hard, and Greta seized a handful of your hair, yanked your head up, and slammed it back down again. You wheezed and whimpered, trying to push and scratch to no avail, and Greta straddled you, her fist raised, ready to punch-

Your left hand closed over something cylindrical, smooth and vaguely wet and warm. As quick as you could, even as Greta drew back her fist, you whipped the lid off the last jar of blood, brought it out from the depths of your bag and tossed what was left of the sample square into Greta's snarling face.

She shrieked like a banshee, rearing back and gagging, and you took the opportunity to throw her off your body. You sprang to your feet, stumbling only a little as Greta retched and choked, groping for you blindly with red in her eyes. You took of running, pausing only to pick up your soaking red bag on the way, slamming through the double-doors at the end of the corridor.

You jumped down the steps double-time, jumping at the end and staggering as you hit the floor, then you ran again. In your haste you charged straight through a group of four boys making their way leisurely down the path. You knocked into two of them heavily, felt them stagger.

"What the fuck, dude?" someone called after you furiously, and you turned your head, still running, to look back at them.

"Sorry!" you yelled hoarsely, tearing out the front gate and out of sight.

"Fuckin' weirdo," mumbled Richie Tozier to Bill Denbrough, who was bending down to help Eddie stand after that girl had barged into them. Richie hauled Stan, who had also fallen, to his feet and clapped him on the shoulder, before picking something up off the ground.

"Stan my man, you dropped your yokefellow!" Richie told Stan cheerfully, holding a brimless cap up with a flourish.

"Yarmulke," Stan corrected tiredly, snatching it back.

"Bless you."

"E-Eddie, I think that g-g-girl left a suh-suh-stain on your sh-shirt just now," Bill interrupted demurely.

"Is that fucking blood?" Eddie squeaked, his eyes widening in horror.

"What the fuh-fuh-fuck?" Bill laughed.

"Maybe it was that time of the month," Richie said wisely.

"Buh-beep beep, Richie."

Richie looked seriously at Eddie, who was frantically scrubbing at the dark red patch on his perfect pink shirt. "Werewolves," he told the littler boy sagely.

"Shut up, Richie!" all three of the boys said together, as they crossed through the front gate, making for the Barrens.

——

a/n: just a lil something to get my creativity going while i work on requests. let me know if you want to be tagged in coming parts!! i’m thinking there will be at least two more <3

[punkscowardschampions]

Saint & Leilani

Saint: So, how many people with my surname have found their way into your inbox today? Leilani: few Saint: I hope those few have behaved and not been too taxing on your typing fingers or your patience Leilani: you're making it sound more fun & scandalous than it came close to Saint: That would be an odd but not unentirely precedented way to welcome you for us Saint: I'm just more than aware how...much, shall we be polite and say, some of them can be, even at the best of times Leilani: 😅 Leilani: are you forgetting which one of you I live with? Saint: 😅 Saint: I am in no way doubting your ability to cope with it, or previous experience doing so, just apologizing for the times you don't feel like being so gracious about their...persistence Leilani: thanks, I think? Leilani: the sentence was a mouthful to digest but I detected some sweetness in it Saint: I'm happy to apologize for my taste as well Saint: and will try to be more palatable Leilani: coming thick & fast but still smooth with it, that's impressive Saint: I'll accept that I'm potentially being much of a muchness with some of the more well-meaning but over-the-top members of my family, if that's what you're saying Saint: but admittedly, I'll struggle to hear I'm on par with certain ones who best remain nameless until I get more of a gage for your tolerance of their particular brand of care 😅 Leilani: I'm not saying much, personally, until I work out how much of this welcome wagon is genuinely what you'd like to say vs what you feel like you must Leilani: to make up for the rest or walk on eggshells in case I crack up Saint: Well, I haven't been instructed to talk to you, if that's what you mean Saint: and without a doubt, I have no idea how I would ideally like to broach this subject, because I have literally no firsthand experience Saint: I imagine that must be frustrating, is it? Leilani: it can be coming from you but not coming from you, if you know what I mean Leilani: deep in there, maybe you've got a whole other convo you'd love to be having Saint: I'm receptive to any conversation you'd like to have Saint: well, almost any, I'm sure Leilani: you & everybody else Leilani: the talk about me is non-stop Saint: We wouldn't have to talk about you Saint: I don't have any particular bias towards the subject of you, though it would be bad manners to ask you no questions about yourself, I can refrain if you have, like I said and assumed, had enough for a while Leilani: it's good manners if I'm in no mood to answer questions about me Leilani: but it'd be my bad to tell you to shush & end this convo just like that Saint: As you've saved me from the mortal sin of impoliteness with your rhetoric there, I'll save you from having to do so and can leave it there Leilani: take a turn in the hot seat, see how you feel about it Leilani: prep if I haven't saved you from 👿🔥 Saint: I'm not inclined to believe the creator would be that unforgiving, but that's what Catholicism will do for your morals, I suppose Saint: Fire away, as it were 🔥 Leilani: you're a catholic? Saint: Culturally, definitely Saint: I'm not sure my commitment to the church is such I can claim myself as fully saved, yet Leilani: mine goes as far as loving the 1st Eid for its treats & ignoring the sacrifices of the 2nd, can't call it commitment Saint: I don't think you're alone in that philosophy and approach Saint: but I don't necessarily think that's terrible at all, as long as you're finding some joy and fulfilment from religion- that is certainly a huge tenant of all the ones I've heard of, so it can only be a positive Leilani: how my friends celebrate 🎄🎁🎅 shows me I'm not Leilani: party > church Saint: Precisely, commercialism argument aside Saint: any promotion of togetherness, community and goodwill, what could be the issue? Leilani: the issue is in the confusion Leilani: people thinking it's something its not Saint: There's plenty issue around 🎄🎁🎅 but no more than most anything in our society today Leilani: if you're trying to take issue with something on any level, you'll find a way Saint: Don't you think problems should be solved? Leilani: if it can Leilani: big if Saint: Of course Saint: I think the if only makes the pursuit of more vital, I don't find it to be invalidating Leilani: sure but some questions aren't if or but ones Saint: Such as? Leilani: if I said, you're the fittest member of this family, let's go out, your answer would be no, becos you are a member of this family, it doesn't matter if you add I would if I wasn't Leilani: the answer's still no Saint: No, my answer would be that there's truly only one absolute in this life Saint: that I know of Saint: there are laws, ethics, morality and codes of conduct in all societies, sure Saint: but nothing is certain Leilani: birth & death are certain Leilani: one brought you here, the other me Saint: I was thinking about death Saint: birth is luck, usually, it's a little different Leilani: 🤔 Leilani: accepted Saint: We can differ on perspectives there, it's fine 😃 Saint: in fact, the father would probably want to put forth an argument for the opposite, now I think about it Saint: worse Catholic than I thought Leilani: I was thinking that 🤰 = birth, the certainty part being you don't get to stay in but you know Saint: I see what you mean Saint: anyone that is here is a certainty Saint: think we're going into Schroedinger territory there, I respect it Leilani: 🙀📦 Saint: 👍 Saint: who am I to say that whatever people are before and after they're people here can't debate philosophy Leilani: these are bigger questions than I expected Saint: And I wasn't meant to even ask how you were Saint: 🤐 Saint: go on Leilani: I've got a headache now 😅 Saint: Oh dear Saint: That's the first time that's happened, I would assure you but that sounds like a losing battle and another knock for my ego Leilani: your ego wants to take it as brush off, retro as hell Leilani: but I don't get questions that deep posed around me is all Saint: Retro...God, just don't take my 'deep' questions as a sign of pretension or I'm getting more tragic by the second! Leilani: it's okay I'm not a downtrodden wifey from back in the day, we're in an era where I can just tell you no Saint: and we're all the better for it Saint: though I don't think I've asked you any question where you'd be directly answerable to me 🤔 Saint: giving me a little too much credit for the universe and it's many questions there Leilani: I don't want your ego to end this convo black & blue Saint: That's very kind of you Saint: but my ability to take criticism could be compared to your ability to cope with Grace, just so we're clear Leilani: Grace isn't hard to cope with Leilani: I like her Saint: I'm glad to hear that, it would be really hard if you didn't Saint: harder, than it is, of course Saint: don't think I'm bashing her really, as I said, they all mean well, I can just imagine that relentless good intentions and meaningful conversations to be had would get very exhausting very fast Leilani: everything's happened fast Leilani: they're all playing catch up to the unexpected Saint: But you're the important one here Saint: most, although I was adding that to try and take the pressure off but clearly that's easier said than done Leilani: this is where I add something about pressure creating 💎 Saint: I don't loathe the sentiment but does it make you feel any better? Leilani: no Saint: then I wouldn't worry Saint: and I doubt there's anything hugely meaningful I can do to make you feel better in an impactful, big way Saint: but if you think of anything on a smaller scale that you would like Saint: don't hesistate to ask Leilani: will you introduce me to everyone in a retro way? Leilani: 🗨  & 🤝 Saint: That I can do Saint: The upsides to this family being as large as it is is that you're never short of functions to hijack for whatever purpose you may need Saint: and you won't have to worry about being centre of attention unless it's your birth, wedding or death Saint: even then, people have their own agendas Leilani: no pressure or as close as Leilani: when's the next? Saint: Exactly Saint: [literally whatever and whenever we want, offer a selection to show your point lol] Leilani: [picks the one where she can serve the best lewk because gotta make an impression regardless especially when you're nervous] Leilani: it's a date Saint: That it is Saint: if you'd rather show up with another kid, I'm happy to come pick you up from Grace's Saint: up to you, of course Leilani: pick me up 🚗 Leilani: I have no idea how Grace is allowed on the road Saint: 😅 Saint: I suppose they reckon the amount of potholes, we're all playing a dangerous game at the mercy of the council Leilani: 🙏 by god's grace like Saint: Seems that's all that's left in the budget 🙄 Leilani: 😅😅 Saint: I think you're in my sister's year Saint: Venus, that is Leilani: what should I think about it? Saint: You know you hypothesized that I was the fittest member of this family? Leilani: it's too late to drop the bomb that I should've asked her to pick me up Saint: She'll need a lift as much as you Saint: but meaning, she'd have taken DEEP offence to that assertion Saint: the headache would be realer Leilani: oops Leilani: & yikes Saint: again, not here on a smear campaign Saint: but I'd be doing you a disservice if I pretended she's universally easy to get on with Saint: perhaps you'll take to each other though Leilani: I'm not easy to get on with atm Leilani: but I do get a free pass Saint: You're doing fine Saint: unless this is your attempt at belligerence, in which case, sorry 😬 Leilani: attempting nothing but no pressure face to face intros Leilani: how could you forget already? Saint: 🤦 forgive me? Leilani: 💅 Leilani: hold on, I'll ask myself what my god would do Leilani: ... Leilani: yeah sure Saint: 😅 Saint: I was hoping distraction only fell under bad manners, not sin Leilani: it depends how you're distracting me Saint: What I offered would depend on how 😇/😈 you preferred your distractions Leilani: if I don't have both on offer how can I possibly choose? Saint: That's completely fair, actually Leilani: I know Leilani: so don't be unfair Saint: Wouldn't dream of it Leilani: is there anyone else you'd like to warn me about, while you're being fair? Leilani: or anyone I should run into the arms of like 🤗🤗? Saint: Warn would be extreme Saint: I don't think anyone is that bad Saint: I would have to know you better personally to say who I think you'd really click with, but there's plenty of us, I'm sure you will with someone Leilani: indulge me in the drama of it, St Leilani: 🤦😅 Saint: Oh, right Saint: you want the gossip of it all so you also have prior information on them coming into the conversations Saint: let me think then Leilani: I miss when my friends wanted to talk about that stuff Leilani: instead of me & my feelings Saint: That makes sense Saint: maybe you and Vee will get on then Saint: there's just a lot of drama to get into Saint: your head and inbox would be rocked Leilani: I've got time Leilani: & my head's already a mess Saint: Okay then Saint: bear with me if my typing speed gets retro Leilani: 😄 Saint: [just methodically go through all that is messed up with the fam nbd] Leilani: holy hell Leilani: I know I asked for that but did I though? Leilani: where have I come to live Leilani: 👋🚕 Saint: Yes Saint: sorry Leilani: hold on I need to just ✈️ Leilani: I thought my mum's relationship history was crazy Saint: It is what it is Saint: we all still manage fine Leilani: by the grace of god again, or whatever other means necessary Saint: Maybe Saint: I don't think it's all that dire now Leilani: maybe when I've come though all the stages of grief I'll be able to let you know what I think Saint: Look forward to it Leilani: I did make it sound really hot Saint: 😏 Saint: we're not all messed up, thank you Leilani: I'm used to being that half of the convo Leilani: you do you Saint: How are you messed up then? Leilani: other than having no parents now? Saint: Yeah Leilani: I'm not doing this right Leilani: any of it Saint: What aren't you doing right? Leilani: I miss her but like she's gone on holiday or a work course Leilani: not like she's never coming back Saint: Well, what's the first stage of grieving Saint: you feel like you aren't missing her hard enough, but if you were out of denial already, you'd actually be taking it way too fast Saint: be rude, right? Saint: Think of it like that Leilani: my rudeness is worse, wanting to hang out with my friends how I did before Leilani: care about 👗👠💄 Saint: Your entire world has been turned upside down Saint: of course you're craving normality Saint: I'm not just saying all this to appease you Saint: you're a kid that just lost her mum Saint: I literally do not believe there's any way you could get through this that would be wrong, or would reflect poorly on you Leilani: she needs to walk back in & badmouth all her worst clients Leilani: she can't be lost Saint: I'm so sorry Saint: that it's so unfair Leilani: unfair was when my dad stopped sending money & letters after going back home for what he said would be a few months Leilani: this is Leilani: I don't even know Saint: How old were you? Leilani: does it make a difference? Saint: Did it? Leilani: I'd just started school, so financially, yeah Saint: Do you know what he's doing now, like, where he is? Leilani: no Leilani: my mum said he had another family there Leilani: someone he was actually married to Saint: Right Saint: that was a cowardly thing for him to do Saint: the minimum would've been financial support Leilani: sadly I can't get it backdated Leilani: imagine Leilani: 👗👠💄 Saint: I'd have to look into it Saint: but probably not Saint: very hard to enforce at any rate Leilani: & taking food out of his other children's mouths, assuming he has some others Saint: Yeah Saint: but you can't be held responsible for his life choices Leilani: neither can they then Saint: I meant it'd be his problem to worry about and solve Saint: but I can understand not wanting to literally steal candy from a baby, as it were Leilani: I haven't been his problem for years, I'm Grace's now Leilani: this family's with all their existing crazy Saint: Okay, getting in contact with your dad for reparations isn't the first step Leilani: it's a mis-step Leilani: he fell off the earth, I'm not following him Saint: Okay Saint: so, what would you be doing with your friends today, if things were normal? Leilani: 🛍 Saint: So, I'll give you both options Saint: I can drive you to your friends, or whatever 🛍 you go to with them Saint: or you can come 🛍 with me Leilani: you can take me Leilani: they don't know how to act now that I'm 💣💥 Saint: they probably think they're giving you time Saint: but really, they're asking for it Saint: at least, that's how I see it Saint: maybe next weekend, or the next Saint: but we can go for now Leilani: it's okay, I wouldn't deal any better if the roles were reversed Leilani: it's not their bad that there's nothing to say or do Saint: You're very fair Saint: not to detract from how much of a 💣💥 you feel Leilani: you're flattering me like I'm not a 💣💥 Leilani: I don't know what that says about you Saint: It's honesty, not flattery Saint: The situation is a 💣💥 Saint: I've seen people handle significantly worse, that's all Leilani: it feels nice, honesty doesn't usually Saint: that's a resounding endorsement Saint: probably a bit too smug to put on a poster or LinkedIn but still, I appreciate it Leilani: you know what I mean, honesty is usually like that 💅 isn't the one or you need braces, child Saint: I think people purposefully conflate being honest with being rude Saint: but you can weaponize anything if you're that sort of person Leilani: yeah ☕ Saint: There's plenty of that sort at church Leilani: & the salon Saint: I've spent less time there myself but I imagine they're much of a muchness Saint: 👵 they all love me, obviously but father is a perfect case study for diplomacy Leilani: it's a type of church for some people Leilani: they take it as serious as a religion Saint: Hair and beauty has always been important Leilani: they just like being able to see results, there's no guarantee when you pray Saint: I'd argue there's no guarantee you get the result you wanted Saint: perhaps even less than 🙏 Saint: maybe you get what you need, not what you want Leilani: 😅😅 Leilani: maybe not for 👵 if they're trying to look 👩 Saint: it highlights the limitations of communication Saint: you think you've asked concisely for one thing, and you end up with something that's nothing like that at all Leilani: I swear I did see my mum work some genuine miracles, that said Saint: It is without a doubt impressive what can be achieved Leilani: what do you want to be? Saint: I want to work for the government Leilani: we haven't been talking that long but that has come through Saint: Is there any particular way you'd like me to take that honesty? Leilani: as a compliment? Leilani: I think Saint: 😅 I think I can manage that then Leilani: I'll tell you what I used to want to be when I was a child, that's weirder Saint: Not admitting it's weird, but go on Saint: I'm intrigued Leilani: clues: Leilani: 🦷💉🥛�� Leilani: 🚫🍬🍭🍫 Saint: Okay, question, just the one Saint: did you want to be rich or did you just really care about oral hygiene? Leilani: I wanted to make people pretty like my mum, I suppose was the thought process Leilani: & 😁 = happy Saint: So it's even more adorable than I first thought Saint: you don't want to be a dentist anymore? Leilani: the reality is way more gory than I knew then Saint: That's enough to give me a headache Leilani: I need a job with no blood or pus Leilani: even typing that made me feel weird Saint: 😖 Saint: Subject change Saint: are you going to buy anything today? Leilani: do I need to dress to impress your family or just myself? Saint: do you want me to invite my family out shopping with us? Leilani: you do have a lot of sisters Leilani: but you know I meant do I need a new outfit for this meet & greet you're taking me to of the entire extended clan Saint: Oh, gotcha Saint: dress for yourself, of course Saint: unless dressing to impress makes you feel more at ease, in which case, go for that and you won't be alone Leilani: it can't hurt Saint: No, there we go then 😊 Saint: though you can still do the aimless browsing I know 🛍 trips are really about, of course Leilani: are you looking to dress up too? Saint: I like to look presentable Leilani: oh good becos if it was just me, Grace & your sister that'd be a statement Saint: 😅 Saint: don't worry, it won't be Leilani: I'll do my happy dentist 😁 then Leilani: as I'm thrilled Saint: I'm just as 😁 to hear that Leilani: I'll try not to turn it into a frown with excessive browsing Leilani: no promises Saint: I've got a lot of sisters, as you said Saint: I'm sure I'll cope Leilani: which one's your favourite? Saint: which sister? 😂 Saint: I'm not sure there's a diplomatic way to answer that Leilani: answer it honestly, I can promise not to slide in to share the news Saint: Well, Jay is older and we didn't meet her until she was a kid so that combined with her personality makes her the most chilled out now Saint: Vee is younger but still close enough that we were kids together, so that makes her prime annoying younger sister category Saint: then the twins are that much younger that they get to be removed from that, and I have more of that protective older brother in me Leilani: Okay so Jay's your fave Leilani: what's your brother like? Saint: No, I didn't say that Saint: but she wasn't here in the beginning and she's grown up and gone now, it's easy to have less negatives to say about her Leilani: how old were you when you met? Saint: I was about 3 when we found out about her Saint: but the process took a while because she had a dad that raised her and still wanted to even though she wasn't his like he thought Saint: I think I was about 8 when she moved in and spent most of her time with us Leilani: that must have been such a weird time Saint: it was Saint: Vee was born around the time we found out about her so Saint: that was a trial too Leilani: your parents have had a LOT going on Saint: Yes, it seems to be their forte Leilani: your brother then Saint: he's younger too, so again, protective Saint: probably because we're outnumbered too Leilani: an if question Leilani: if you had to give me one of them, as an only child, which one would you give me? Saint: 😂 an odd request but okay, let me 🤔 Saint: Probably Sekh Saint: from the short conversation we've had, you have things in common, that would work well 🛍👠💄👗 Leilani: you're gonna separate the twins? very disney channel Saint: It was either lump them in together there and offend them, or separate and acknowledge that they're separate people Saint: they'll understand 😅 Leilani: 😅 Leilani: safer if I ask Grace for a pet instead Saint: Sure that she'd be down for that Saint: 🐰🐹🐱🐶🐠? Leilani: 🤔 Saint: That is a big decision Saint: best to take your time, decide how much effort you wanna put in to day to day care Leilani: 🐱 or 🏠🐰 Saint: Cute Saint: got any names or do you need to see it before assigning one Leilani: it feels fairer to meet them 1st Saint: 👍 Saint: we can go to the nearest pet shop/shelter if you'd like Leilani: adopt don't shop, St Leilani: or else 👿🔥 Saint: Indeed 😏 Saint: but you know most shops rescue their animals now anyway Saint: except fish...but I don't know how we're morally meant to feel about breeding fish? Leilani: we won't buy any, be on the safe & 😇 side Saint: It's your day Saint: I wouldn't try to bring you down to 👿🔥 levels Leilani: thanks, I have only just moved in Saint: Definitely not my intention with this conversation, or any going forward Leilani: that comes through too Saint: Is that a compliment? Leilani: I don't know if you're 😁 or not to be a good & polite boy Saint: Why would I want to be anything less 😇? Leilani: becos of your name maybe Saint: Subverting expectations Saint: I'd argue people expect the opposite from me though, regardless of my first name Leilani: in your case pressure makes 😇 Saint: 🤞 I hope so Leilani: I'll subvert expectations for us both Saint: Is that your new plan? Leilani: I don't really have one Leilani: other than the 🛍 Saint: Well, you have time Leilani: yeah, it's the keyword that's getting thrown around most atm Saint: It's not provably true but it's most likely the case Leilani: & it'll fill an awkward silence Saint: I can clearly talk enough for the both of us Saint: it doesn't need to be awkward Leilani: this isn't, but remember how we ref-ed that you weren't the only McKenna in my 💬📱 Saint: Right Saint: is there anything you'd like me to do, beyond the formal introductions Saint: politely suggest some people give it some time, perhaps? Leilani: use the time thing against them, I like it 😅 Saint: Only fair 🙂 Saint: consider it done Leilani: we're back into retro hubby & wifey territory Saint: You think? Leilani: it's very defence squad but I'm not 😤 Saint: I'm not helping you because you're a girl and I'm a boy Saint: just because I have the ability to Leilani: I know, you're coming across capable Saint: I'd like to think so Saint: but bragging about it would not be 😇 nor helpful Leilani: I've got your back in hyping you up a 😇 amount Saint: That's sweet Saint: I promise my ego is not that fragile that I need you to but it's still nice Leilani: I'd like to think I am Leilani: that it's not all doom & gloom in me, but maybe time will have to tell, annoyingly Saint: It shows Saint: honestly Saint: you aren't what's happened to you, even if that is all you can think about right now, or feel it's all you're meant to, or are allowed to, whatever Leilani: whether or not I'm her death, I was her life Leilani: there's credit for how she raised me, I mean Saint: Definitely Saint: I don't know you yet, but I would like to get to know you, from what I've seen Saint: I won't throw out proud for her but, you know Saint: I would be in her position Leilani: I don't know what to say Leilani: that feels above nice to hear Saint: I'm almost certain she would want you to know that, at the very least Leilani: yeah, she would Leilani: she wasn't too humble for a brag Saint: 😅 Saint: you should continue that tradition then Leilani: you'll regret saying that when I make you take 10000000000000s of pictures of me posing in different 👗 Saint: 😏 I'll have to buy myself something expensive to cope, I'm sure Leilani: ⌚️ so you can keep an eye on the time Saint: I have an uncharacteristically free day today Saint: my time is yours Leilani: what are we waiting for? come get me Saint: That's what I was waiting for Saint: I'll be with you shortly Leilani: consent given Saint: 👍